This invisible illness

I'm laying here quite awake now; while most of the world is fast asleep
A restlessness has quickly overtaken me and  I'm finding I cannot sleep
What can I do but rise up from here and be distracted from my  pain
I'm in the company of angels and with them I shall find peace again.

It's hard for me to keep on going with this invisible source of pain
I know that these pains are really real pains. They come to me again and again.
It's hard for me to keep on with all this hurting that never seems to go away
But I trust that with God and with all his  angels I'll make it through each day

Some say that they understand me, that they understand what I'm going through
But I know that this isn't even possible, because my illness is understood by so few
I carry a burden that's really quite heavy, it makes me feel awkward in the crowd
I find the shouting of so many voices is quite a challenge when it gets more loud.

I have this pain and this incurable illness that won't let me forget that it's there
I feel embarrassed by my own inability whenever it creeps up on me. It isn't fair.
I find it challenging to miss so much of my life's happenings:  so much of what I could do
Instead I must learn to be content with the knowing:
                      this shall be with me my whole life through